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In the opening chapters of his book, Daniel Berenger talks about an eye-opening study regarding the differences between female and male sexuality. Meredith Chivers, a professor of Clinical Psychology at Queen’s University conducted a study of the sexual response in men and women, comparing one’s subjective arousal to the arousal as measured by blood flow to the genitals.

Subjects – men and women of various sexual orientations – would watch an assortment of videos of 90 seconds each- heterosexual and homosexual couples having sex, nude men, nude women, men and women masturbating and a pair of bonobos mating.

Much of our belief about human sexuality – the importance and universality of monogamy, for example – stem from the Flintsonization of primitive cultures.

Darwin was a notorious prude and this directly influenced his interpretations of evolution, as well as the interpretations of those who came after him.

But we’ve seen over and over again that, in fact, human sexuality has far less to do with reproduction than evo-psych would have us believe.

We let the narrative control how we see the world and that belief affects everything else.

Scientists have long said that males of almost every species are the sexual aggressors, because we’ve long believed that males are the universally dominant gender.

But because we believe this, we overlook evidence to the contrary.

Humans in particular are built for multiple partners; male genitalia and sexual response are designed to flush out the sperm of other males.The goal of evo-psych is to show that our modern behavior is inborn, that everything from whom we’re attracted to, to social dynamics, is born out of evolution instead of societal change.Women, for example, are built for monogamy and are less interested in sex in general – so the theory goes – because sperm is metaphorically cheap while eggs are expensive; there is less metabolic cost to men for producing sperm, while women not only generate the ovum, but place their health and safety at risk by bearing the child.Not, mind you, that this meant that women’s sexuality was embraced or approved of.The madonna/whore dichotomy was well and truly in place early on.

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