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It goes without saying that if one spouse has a friend that threatens the other spouse in any way, the Policy of Joint Agreement dictates that the relationship should be modified or ended completely depending on what can be enthusiastically agreed upon by the spouses.

But I take it one step further to warn couples that any friendship with someone of the opposite sex should be carefully evaluated because of the risks involved.

But there are many other reasons to avoid an affair.

It's terribly damaging to the couple's children, and even to members of the extended family.

It's friends who meet these other needs I've mentioned that can slip under the radar.

That person of the opposite sex becomes irresistible and that irresistibility, in turn, makes you somewhat irrational regarding the wisdom of the relationship -- you want that person to be in your life at all costs.

Opposite-sex friends have an unusual opportunity to make massive Love Bank deposits.

I've found that when people rate their most painful experiences, their spouse's affair usually gets the top rating.

For that reason alone, couples should avoid an affair at all costs because of the suffering it causes the betrayed spouse.

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