Dating marriage or friendship
Attraction must always be present and must always come prior to any romantic connection.It doesn't have to be physical, but I think there needs to be something about that person that turns you on.I also have friends who don't share their different friend circles, for fear of social miscegenation.Also, everyone has had or been a "bad friend" at some point in their lives, right?I'll be "friendly," but a real friendship requires some level of honesty and ease.I know some people are capable of masking their true feelings, a la Joey Potter, but that's just not in my nature.
I'm never fully attracted to someone unless I think of them as a friend first. The sex part just either completes what was developed, or if they're both asexuals it never forms part of the relationship. Sex is mostly just a biological urge nothing to do with love.
(One sees this "friends first" business all the time as the headline in women's personals ads on singles sites.) I mean, who's gonna actually be friends with someone, much less court them, when the first thing they do is start dictating the terms of the relationship?
(A: the weasel — the guy with no other options who hangs around under false pretenses hoping to eventually be rewarded for playing by the rules.) I think it's all this disingenuousness -- maybe it's simple confusion, maybe it's just a bad euphemism or a cop-out -- which leads to "friends first" not working so well.
For example, my biggest turn on is someone with vocal talent-specifically impersonations.
If you can do a really good Kermit imitation, I'm yours.