Dating a single mom with kids

Don't have shared custody or family or friends in the area? You're older now, hopefully wiser, and have kids to consider.You can't date the same way now as you did in your twenties, Baumgartner says.Instead, focus on topics that are easy to discuss and help you learn about each other.Though you may be excited about a new relationship, be extra cautious about sharing this information with your kids."Time with friends, time spent on activities that don't include kids or work, and time alone are all important." If you don't have time for these, your schedule may be too busy to fit dating in -- for now.If you want to date, you'll have to make time in your life for it.

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"A good rule of thumb is to do a 'morning after' gut check," Boykin says.

"As kids get older, you may choose to share more casual details about your new boyfriend," says Esther Boykin, a licensed marriage and family therapist and relationship coach outside of Washington, D. "But for younger kids it's often best to start by introducing the idea that you have a new friend who you like to spend time with." When you're finally ready for the first meeting, start with a casual group activity your kids enjoy, like a picnic at a park with friends who have kids.

If you do break up with someone your kids have already gotten to know, try to explain it to younger children in terms they'll understand.

The children may already feel they lost one parent in the divorce, Baumgartner says, you don't want to put them through another loss if this relationship ends.

It's also important to consider the age and personality of your children.

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